Warning: This post is more of a vent than a post J
As I mentioned in my previous blog, I took a 3 day vacation with
4 other moms to Las Vegas. My plan was to watch some news in my hotel room (we don’t
have cable at home), lay out by the pool, eat at the free buffet included with
the room and do some outlet shopping. It was just as great as I imagined, if
not better. I do enjoy a good slot machine but I wish Vegas would recognize
that most people DO NOT smoke these days and make designated smoking sections for
those who do like to puff and play but that’s not the reason for this post.
All of the ladies agreed that what we wanted to do all day was
lay out by the pool. It was super crowded and most of the shady spots were
taken. The cabana (which included shaded couches, lounges, inner tubes for the
lazy river, a fridge, a TV, an outlet and our own private waitress) was kind of
pricey but we talked to the guy in charge and he seemed willing to come down
quite a bit to give us a deal since it was a week day. While we were haggling, I
mentioned that a few of us were stay-at-home moms who desperately needed a
break from our crazy days with the kids at home. His response was so idiotic
that it didn’t register for a few seconds. “Oh, so you guys are here spending
your husbands’ money while they are hard at work,” he says. I’m sorry,
WHAT???!!! There are so many things wrong with that question I don’t even know
where to begin.
I try to keep in mind most of the time that I am a Christian
and I am representing the church, and even though it was incredibly challenging
to hold my tongue, all I did was take a deep breath, shake my head, smile and
walk away while the other ladies finished talking to Mr. Vegas. I doubt this sleazy
man who appeared to be in his mid 40s was married, or at least not happily
married, because he flirted with women poolside all day and I know he did not
have kids. Otherwise he would not have said something so ignorant. Luckily I have
a blog where I can vent when people like him get my blood boiling.
For some reason, I thought people generally had respect for
stay-at-home moms. I’m not saying working moms have it any easier. I honestly
don’t know which is harder. However, what this man was implying was that our
husbands were working hard making money while we contributed nothing to the
household income and simply babysat. And long overdue mini vacations are irresponsible
and selfish.
I would have loved to have a long conversation with this
uneducated man about how I used to work as a customer service manager. I would
say that about 90% of my customers were angry and insulted me and the company I
worked for daily. My day was filled with reports, deadlines, politics, a
condescending and sexist male general manager and customers who called me names
and often used profanity. This was my job for 6 years right up until the day
before I went into labor with my first child. Not to mention my hour long
commute in bumper to bumper traffic there and back.
I thought a job like that would prepare me and give me the
tools I would need to be a good mom and wife. Things like patience,
multi-tasking and managing my household. Boy was I misled. Being at home with
my girls is far more challenging than I could have ever imagined. It is far
more difficult than my job as a customer service manager for more reasons than I
could possibly list.
My job now is 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. The day
starts with my two-year-old waking me up at 5:55AM shouting from her crib, “Mommy,
I go poopoo!” The day ends after I put my girls to bed (who don’t actually go
to sleep for another hour after they are in bed) then I clean up the mess that
has taken over every room in the house, do the dishes, brush my teeth, wash my
face and fall into bed. Add a pregnancy to that and forget about it! But that’s
not even the hard part about staying home with the girls. Sure the job is
physically demanding but the hardest part is the constant, screaming, fighting,
crying, time-outs and figuring out how to keep them entertained so I can get
the laundry done so my husband has underwear the next day. They are also
professional button pushers who have learned what sets me off and love to watch
mommy’s crazy come out.
The thing is though, that I stay at home with my girls because
my husband and I have made this choice for me to be their primary caretaker in
order to create stability and a healthy environment for our children for as
long as possible before we release them into the wild land of school and peer
pressure. We believe that this is giving them a strong foundation. We are doing what we feel is best for our kids at this time.
I really wanted to enlighten Mr. Vegas but it probably would
have gone in one ear and out the other. And that’s okay. I don’t know him. And
his backwards views on marriage and parenthood are not my problem. Maybe one day he’ll have kids and change his
mind. Maybe he won’t.
We did end up getting a killer deal on the cabana and had
the loveliest day I’ve had in years. And I put my anger aside for the day because
it was my time to relax. My husband and I both know that we work super hard for
our family and that is good enough for me.
God has blessed me greatly and I can say that I am happier
now than I’ve ever been. Most of that is having a relationship with Jesus Christ.
And it is a good thing too, because he sends his Holy Spirit to guide me in my
day to day choices. Choices like whether or not to lose my temper when
encountering people like Mr. Vegas. And choices like becoming a monster or
taking a deep breath when the girls push my buttons. How does anyone maintain
sanity without Jesus? I’m glad I will never know ;-)
This is my sister and I floating along the lazy river in our giant matching hats ($12.99 at Ross!) and black matching bathing suits. We looked so cheesy that we decided that we would be Deena and Trina, sisters visiting from Kansas.
